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Man Woman & Mathematics

written by John Chow on April 11th, 2006

Romance Mathematics

  • Smart man + smart woman = romance
  • Smart man + dumb woman = affair
  • Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
  • Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

Office Mathematics

  • Smart boss + smart employee = profit
  • Smart boss + dumb employee = production
  • Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
  • Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

Shopping Math

  • A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
  • A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn’t need.

General Equations & Statistics

  • A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
  • A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
  • A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
  • A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

Happiness

  • To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a
    little.
  • To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to
    understand her at all.

Longevity

  • Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot
    more willing to die.

Propensity To Change

  • A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.
  • A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, and she does.

Discussion Technique

  • A woman has the last word in any argument.
  • Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
montana said on April 11th, 2006 at 8:06 pm

Ain’t that the truth….Good one John…that was a good read.

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taho said on April 11th, 2006 at 8:59 pm

Good stuff.
All too simple and all too true.

Some of you might want to think twice before inviting your girlfriends or wife over to the computer screen for a read though.
As clever as it may be.
You might wind up spending the rest of the night explaining to her just why you think this is funny and how exactly does it relate to our relationship.
LOL!

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Sharon said on April 11th, 2006 at 11:31 pm

Copied it to my site…. :)

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Vik said on April 12th, 2006 at 9:26 am

Smart man + dumb woman = affair

Ah, God bless them dumb women. They make my life worth living.

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John Chow said on April 12th, 2006 at 2:29 pm

Vik - You better hope your wife doesn’t read this blog. :) I assume you’re married because if you weren’t then you can’t really have an affair. he he

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John Chow said on April 12th, 2006 at 2:30 pm

Oh wait. Maybe you’re talking about the dumb woman having an affair with the single guy. In that case, think protection!

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feras said on April 13th, 2006 at 10:00 pm

I like this post ;)

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